Beauty for Ashes

(Excerpts from my upcoming book)

” Excited for another baby to hold, heading to my Dr’s appointment should have been a joy but something was very wrong. The ultrasound showed our little one’s heartbeat was not working as it should that day…we were losing our little one.

Over the next couple of weeks my heart was breaking over the news knowing my body was taking its course and it was looking inevitable. The night I realized it was truly happening, I drove myself to the ER with my little family still fast asleep in their warm beds. The time had come..there was no turning back. I was having to say goodbye when I was just beginning to say hello to this precious new life.

My heart was in two as I went through the motions of having a baby yet in the baby. The room was eerily quiet as I lay in my bed in the dark with only the rythmic steady sounds of the hospital equipment doing what it needed to do to help the heartbreaking process. I felt so incredibly alone and sad. In the moment… I breathed a prayer to my God for comfort and instinctively reached out my hand. As I did, I knew..that I knew..that I knew…someone was holding it. Yet I saw no one. My Jesus had come to comfort me as He had done so many times in my life before. I was 21 now….and I knew I could. Could what I didn’t know. I just knew I could.

In the days, weeks and years that followed, I still yearned for the child that had left us far too soon. But I could go on for my little growing family. He had given me peace that passes understanding as He promises any that ask. He had been right there…right beside me sharing my sadness..and I could go on.

In the years to follow we were blessed with a complete family of four beautiful daughters! My God had not only restored what had been stolen from me, He had turned my sorrow into joy and..

Gave me beauty for ashes.♥️.” (Isaiah 61:3)

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